Balancing Self Critique

If we’re honest about it, while there will always be judgment from strangers and even from those we are familiar with, the reality is, in many cases, you are your worst critic. We judge ourselves the hardest. While it’s beneficial to be hard on ourselves to drive us and push us towards greater success, there’s nothing beneficial or healthy about being harsh on yourself.

There are going to be times where you make a mistake or drop the ball or don’t get something right, it is in those moments that you cannot allow that inner voice of harsh critique to take the center stage on your mind. Cussing yourself out, belittling yourself and thinking so little of yourself, my friend, that is self-abuse.

Harshly critiquing yourself opens the door to depression, despair, and even death. If you make a mistake or drop the ball, don’t start calling yourself names and cussing yourself out. When you call yourself stupid, simple-minded, or walk around saying, ‘I am so forgetful’, my friend, you are coming into agreement with an identity of yourself that was never given to you by God. The scripture reminds us that the enemy is the father of lies. The intention of every lie ever spoken is to deceive.

When you speak to yourself in the language of deception, it hinders you from moving forward in your goals, your dreams and even in your relationships. You will start hearing yourself say things like, “Nothing ever works out for me.” Or “I just feel so stuck.” God’s intention is not for you to walk around feeling stuck or walking in circles. The scripture reminds us that the Truth will set you free.

‍Start intentionally reminding yourself of God’s truth: The truth is that you have been fearfully and wonderfully made in His image; The truth, is there is not one righteous person on earth that hasn’t messed up. At the end of the day, you gotta give yourself some grace if you wanna stay in the race.

But also, we don’t just find ourselves harshly critiquing ourselves when we make mistakes or drop the ball. We also tend to judge ourselves very harshly because we are self conscious about something we don’t like about ourselves. All of us struggle with something about ourselves that we don’t like or wish we could fix. Some of us stutter. Some of us are dealing with alopisha, maybe you hate the way your teeth look, maybe your pinky toe looks its always having a bad day. Listen, life is hard enough as it is. Don’t allow what you are self conscious about take away from your mental health. God says it like this: before I formed you in the womb, I already knew you. I knew how big your forehead was going to be, the bumps on your face, your struggle with loosing your hair, your stuttering problem, how strong or how weak your eyes would be. There is nothing about you that has been hidden from the sight of God.

Let me encourage you to start loving yourself again. Not becoming a lover of yourself, where you become arrogant and conceited and become no good for anyone. But seeing and loving yourself the way God sees and loves you. Loving yourself starts with changing what you believe about yourself. And what you believe about yourself starts with what you say about yourself. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to check yourself every time you think or say something negative about yourself and replace it with a positive word or thought. Joseph Murphy in his book, The Power of Your Subconscious Mind says, “Never finish a negative statement; reverse it immediately, and wonders will happen in your life.”